A few months ago, I listened to Poetry Speaks, a book with great poets reading their own works and accompanying text. While reading along with the poets, I noticed most of the time they spoke words that were different from the published version of the poem. The more I write, the more I’ve come to understand why that is. Perhaps there are some writers/artists that can create and walk away from the product. Not me, nearly every time I review a poem, I change some word.
Most weeks I submit poems for my writing group to critique. Every time it’s pleasure and pain. They are wonderful, bright writers and are always kind with their criticism. They never fail to zing me on a poem that I knew wasn’t good enough — even I wasn’t happy with — like they did last night for my poem, The Idea of Home.
Another of the poems they reviewed last night is posted earlier on this blog under “What happened to the dress?” I weigh all their input. Some recommendations I use; some recommendations I just shrug off. Here is the latest version of that poem, new title (thank you, Susan), and all.
Relics
“I left my wedding dress hanging in a tree somewhere in North Dakota.”
Julia’s Choice by Cathy Lamb
The dress hung there
more than a week before anyone noticed it.
Barbara saw the flap of white, pulled a U-ey
and went back to look.
Was it a ghost, a parachute, or what?
she had to know for sure
and seeing it was a wedding dress
what the heck?
she dropped to her butt
awed amazed
at the audacity the courage – no, the chutzpah,
it took to strip this dress off
toss it into a tree into the woods
and let Mother Nature take over from there.
So she picked some tiger lilies from the ditch
placed them beneath the dress
and took a picture.
That night when she got to her sister’s over in Kildeer
she told her about the dress in the woods
waving in the wind
showed her the picture
the dress still sparkly with seed pearls and beads.
And they talked about the woman who put it there
where she ended up
where they wanted her to end up.
Barbara said, “Let’s go put something there, too.”
but her sister said,
“No… I think that’s something a woman’s got to do by herself.”
And set her mouth.
A few days later Barbara drove to the dress
there was a blue baby sweater
stuck on the end of a branch.
Her sister called that night
to say she’d kicked Travis out
put all his 28 years old
college wasn’t right for me, Mom
can’t find a job
video game playing stuff
at the end of the driveway.
Friday, Barbara found a black garter belt
a bunch of black stockings
tied to another tree
a pair of stilettos planted
deep in the detritus.
The next Tuesday, there was an office chair in the woods
lumbar support propped against a sassafras.
You could still see the wheel tracks
where someone dragged it in from the ditch.
Saturday there was a padded bra
flung way up in the tree above the dress.
Sunday there was a pink ballerina jewelry box with a
stick tepee built over it.
Thursday there was a pile of fresh dirt.
When Barbara dug into it with a stick
she found pictures all torn to pieces.
She covered them back up and
picked some purple loosestrife to lay there.
It goes on like this
some weeks there’s a lot
some weeks nothing
but it hasn’t stopped
the flowers, clothes, things
that joined the wedding dress
left like the crutches at Lourdes.
©Copyright 2008 Pat Edwards
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